One of the many things I see disappearing in modern western civilization is religion. No, it will never be gone. I don't think so. There are to many unanswered questions that are so easily answered with "God". Most the people I know are not religious or do not believe in god at all. There is nothing wrong with not believing in god, but there is nothing wrong with being spiritual either.
There seems to be a common misconception that god is like Santa for adults and if you believe in him you are weak or a conformist or simply, just plain stupid. I believe everyone should believe in something you can't see, hear or feel.
I don't really... fit a religion. I believe in god, but I don't believe in the bible. How can you trust a book that has been around for so long, been modified so much, and has so many different versions? A book people use as an excuse for hatred? I believe god does not involve himself in earthly affairs, unless absolutely necessary, and even then it's just a nudge here, a whisper there. Just pointing us in the right direction. He will not cure your cancer, or help you win the lottery, or stop you from feeling lonely. He let's us have free will. He created atoms, knowing the big bang would occur and watched his biggest, most important miracle happen. I believe he created souls**
About Jesus, I see him as history. It's always written by one sides opinion, and so I take it with a grain of salt. Perhaps Mary created a very successful plot to cover up cheating on Joseph or perhaps god really did chose a son to bring faith to the people of Earth. Put a bit of his own soul into a vessel, for his own reasons after seeing humanity go in a direction he hoped it wouldn't.
The reason so many atheists have pissed me off is because I have every right to believe in a god. Even if I am wrong and my body will rot in the ground, and my soul will disappear once my life is over, the idea of my soul being eternal and all this pain, love, and learning not being purposeless, brings me a deep sense of comfort.
If I'm wrong, I will never know. It will be too late. I will be gone, I have no conscience. It doesn't matter. So what right does anyone have to try and take that comfort away from me? Knowing this is not all pointless keeps me sane.
I question other religions, and I question atheism, but I will never accuse anyone of being wrong, or imply it, and I wish to be treated the same.
- Lindsay
** I actually believe in reincarnation. the idea of coming back to earth in a different vessel after I die is a likely idea for me. Recycling a soul, over and over again. I also often believe in Hell and Heaven. Maybe you stay at one or the other between different vessels depending on your actions in said vessel. I don't know, but maybe that's the point.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
This is why I avoid arguments. It is so frustrating (Part Two).
Read part one first.
Firstly, I can't stress enough that Christmas is not synonymous with Christianity. Jesus was not even born on Christmas day, in fact he was born sometime in September. The birthday that is actually being celebrated is the birthday of the sun god Yeshua the Messiah. worshipped by millions throughout the Roman Empire, around 270 AD.
The Christmas Tree was idea brought on by Pagans. For pagan Egyptians the palm tree was used and for Roman Pagans it was the fir. The trees represented the Pagan Messiah. The story is that the mother of the Sun-God was said to have been changed into a tree (for reasons, I don't know), and when in that state she supposedly brought forth her divine son. The son was recognized as the 'Man the branch', which is where the yule log comes from.
So Christians adopted these traditions. That does not mean Christmas is equal to Christianity. I am not Christian, but i still set up a Christmas tree, I still give gifts, I still donate ten times more than I would any other time of the year.
Christmas is not just about religion. It is about happiness, helping out your fellow man, peace on Earth. If It represents Christianity for you, great. If It represents a really great holiday, shout it out. If you want to say "Happy Kwanzaa", because that is what you celebrate. Go right ahead. If your atheist and you think "Happy Holidays" is appropriate, wish people a happy fucking holiday. All of these terms are correct, depending on who you are. We shouldn't be told that only one of these is polite to say. We shouldn't all of a sudden stop putting up the Christmas tree in the center of town and take down the decorations in the street. The spirit of Christmas is important, it makes people want to give, to want to help, want to celebrate and have fun. These are good things.
Words are a powerful thing. When I think of Holiday I think of time off, maybe boarding a plane and staying in mexico, going to DisneyLand, or maybe staying home and getting things done I've been putting off.
When I think of Christmas I think of how Happy my brother is going to be when I give him his gift, I think of Tylar's annual Christmas party and how they except me to come every year, like I am family. It reminds me of volunteering at the mall to raise money for the Salvation army. I think of the shoe box me and my mom stuff with toys, to send out to less fortunate kids. It makes me think of the time I'm going to spend with my family this year, and that great sense of joy when I know I found the perfect gift for my mom. The idea of Christmas is Unity and Peace on Earth. A holiday, is just a holiday. It's a more selfish word than Christmas.
The idea that such a word offends people, is ridiculous to me. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Yule, it all means the same: Giving and happiness, and it should all be said, whenever by whoever.
I feel like Atheism in the new Jehovah Witness. Just leave well enough alone and let people imply what they celebrate or believe, proudly.
Firstly, I can't stress enough that Christmas is not synonymous with Christianity. Jesus was not even born on Christmas day, in fact he was born sometime in September. The birthday that is actually being celebrated is the birthday of the sun god Yeshua the Messiah. worshipped by millions throughout the Roman Empire, around 270 AD.
The Christmas Tree was idea brought on by Pagans. For pagan Egyptians the palm tree was used and for Roman Pagans it was the fir. The trees represented the Pagan Messiah. The story is that the mother of the Sun-God was said to have been changed into a tree (for reasons, I don't know), and when in that state she supposedly brought forth her divine son. The son was recognized as the 'Man the branch', which is where the yule log comes from.
So Christians adopted these traditions. That does not mean Christmas is equal to Christianity. I am not Christian, but i still set up a Christmas tree, I still give gifts, I still donate ten times more than I would any other time of the year.
Christmas is not just about religion. It is about happiness, helping out your fellow man, peace on Earth. If It represents Christianity for you, great. If It represents a really great holiday, shout it out. If you want to say "Happy Kwanzaa", because that is what you celebrate. Go right ahead. If your atheist and you think "Happy Holidays" is appropriate, wish people a happy fucking holiday. All of these terms are correct, depending on who you are. We shouldn't be told that only one of these is polite to say. We shouldn't all of a sudden stop putting up the Christmas tree in the center of town and take down the decorations in the street. The spirit of Christmas is important, it makes people want to give, to want to help, want to celebrate and have fun. These are good things.
Words are a powerful thing. When I think of Holiday I think of time off, maybe boarding a plane and staying in mexico, going to DisneyLand, or maybe staying home and getting things done I've been putting off.
When I think of Christmas I think of how Happy my brother is going to be when I give him his gift, I think of Tylar's annual Christmas party and how they except me to come every year, like I am family. It reminds me of volunteering at the mall to raise money for the Salvation army. I think of the shoe box me and my mom stuff with toys, to send out to less fortunate kids. It makes me think of the time I'm going to spend with my family this year, and that great sense of joy when I know I found the perfect gift for my mom. The idea of Christmas is Unity and Peace on Earth. A holiday, is just a holiday. It's a more selfish word than Christmas.
The idea that such a word offends people, is ridiculous to me. Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Yule, it all means the same: Giving and happiness, and it should all be said, whenever by whoever.
I feel like Atheism in the new Jehovah Witness. Just leave well enough alone and let people imply what they celebrate or believe, proudly.
This is why I avoid arguments. It is so frustrating.
This is the argument.
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia no one is saying that you cannot say merry christmas. The issue is that our government is secular, and christmas is a christian holiday. And our government is taking the right and reasonable choice of taking it away from our public institutions as our public institutions are atheist, and should not favor one religion over another. If we have christmas holidays in school, then we should have ramadan holidays in school as one is just as reasonable as the other. Celebrate and worship whatever you want, just stay the fuck out of my government.
20 hours ago · Like · 4
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia And this whole idea that if you "hate our customs then leave," is racist, bigoted and a shelter for small minded moronic cunts. You know what other countries think like that, Iran, North Korea, China, and Nazi Germany. We are Canadians, we are making a country work that has dozens of ethnicities, religions, and languages. All of our relatives are immigrants, whether you came over from Asia during the last ice age, or a wooden ship in the 1500's. And as Canadians we should be able to make the hard and noble choice to accept other cultures and make it easier for immigrants to be feel accepted in a new land. Only a few countries around the world are able to do this, instead of lamenting our accepting and accomadating culture, maybe be proud of it, as we are one of the few with the balls to do it. So Happy Holidays you morons.
20 hours ago · Like · 3
Ali C Aaron, you're my fucking hero. Just sayin'
20 hours ago · Like
Taylor Kyle Calderwood Well this status is getting more attention then I usually get I should do reposts more often :P
19 hours ago · Like
Ali C *facepalm* Boy, you were born stupid and you've been losing ground ever since.
19 hours ago · Like · 2
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Mine got a lot of attention too haha and now everyone thinks I'm an angry person :/
12 hours ago · Like
Ali C Well, either an angry person or a racist bigot, take your pick.
12 hours ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Um, Angry person. Haha. Though overall I prefer 'Rightfully opinionated
12 hours ago · Like
Ali C Yeah, Racist it is.
11 hours ago · Like
Thomas Irwin actually.. most of those country's would just kill you if you hated their customs. Asking them to leave is much more progressive. realistically we're canadian. We'll bitch and whine and cry about it, but when it comes right down to it we won't force you to do anything. In fact. We'll probably make a law that gives you the right to do whatever we dislike you doing. But thats cool because we'd rather accomodate the latest and greatest Sociological fad instead of sticking to our guns because its more PC. We're not an accomodating culture. We're a Politically correct Fad waiting to happen.
11 hours ago · Unlike · 1
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols ohhh name calling online, how big of you, random person I have never met, who knows very, very little about me. You see me as racist because I believe people should be able to imply what they believe or celebrate at any place at any time. Because I dream of a world where people can say "Merry Christmas", "Happy Hanukkah", "Happy Kwanzaa" or whatever the fuck. I dislike the idea of people forcing their religion down other peoples throats or constantly voicing it, but saying "Merry Christmas"? Big fucking deal.
I have more atheist friends than I can count that set up a Christmas tree (which was invented by PAGAN's BTW), give and receive gifts and say "Merry Christmas". It isn't a big deal and shouldn't be treated as one. Christmas is no longer, and never really was, exclusive to Christians.
The World should be working on tolerance and acceptance, instead of working so hard to please those who won't tolerate and won't accept.
Everyone should be able to show who they are. Wherever.
11 hours ago · Like · 1
Ali C Sorry, couldnt hear you, try taking your klan hood off before speaking.
11 hours ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Actually, you probably can't hear me, cause I'm typing to you. 'Reading' is the idea here.
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia Again no one is taking away your right to your traditions and customs, or your right to say merry Christmas. The issue is with the government support of religious holidays. Of our 10 stat holidays, 3 are Christian, Easter Monday, Good Friday, and Christmas. We have zero stat holidays for any other religion.
In Canada, religion and state are two separate entities, the government should not be allowed to support any religion. And when the government, say...puts up a giant Christmas tree in the middle of town with tax payer money, that's support. Essentially what is happening is the government is forcing everyone who does not believe in that particular brand of bullshit to help foot the bill for your celebration. Which is not right, just to clarify.
Say merry Christmas to everyone, no one cares and no one will stop you. Call it a Christmas tree, who gives a crap. But do not think that you are any one else has the right to force your holidays on our government.
And lindsay, you state that you dream of a world of tolerance, yet you post something that specifically says, "Well.... If you don't like our "Customs" and it offends you so much, then LEAVE.... I will help you pack." That's hardly tolerating and accepting someone. Someone who simply doesn't want to use his money to support your religious holidays.
Christmas trees were not pagan, they were a German tradition and Germans were Christian. And Christmas is a christian holiday, and was very exclusive to Christians. Only recently has it been watered down to a consumer holiday, celebrated by the majority.
And Thomas my response to you was in 2003 Rajinder Atwal was convicted and given a life sentence for killing his 17 year old daughter because she was dating a friend. Its called an honor killing, and its widely practiced in pakistan, and to a much lesser extent India. Last time I checked there is no Canadian law allowing honor killing on Canadian soil. The supreme court just upheld a ban on polygamy, specifically under-age and forced marriage, which is common in fundamental Mormonism, and in India Islamic men are allowed multiple wives. So i would hardly say we pass laws to protect the shit we hate.
4 hours ago · Like · 2
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols You have your opinion, I have mine. Let's agree to disagree and stop spamming Taylor's status.
52 minutes ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols One thing though. I Do agree that "Well.... If you don't like our "Customs" and it offends you so much, then LEAVE.... I will help you pack." is offensive. People can like or dislike whatever they want. That part I regret not cutting out of mine. It's hateful and not right.
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia no one is saying that you cannot say merry christmas. The issue is that our government is secular, and christmas is a christian holiday. And our government is taking the right and reasonable choice of taking it away from our public institutions as our public institutions are atheist, and should not favor one religion over another. If we have christmas holidays in school, then we should have ramadan holidays in school as one is just as reasonable as the other. Celebrate and worship whatever you want, just stay the fuck out of my government.
20 hours ago · Like · 4
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia And this whole idea that if you "hate our customs then leave," is racist, bigoted and a shelter for small minded moronic cunts. You know what other countries think like that, Iran, North Korea, China, and Nazi Germany. We are Canadians, we are making a country work that has dozens of ethnicities, religions, and languages. All of our relatives are immigrants, whether you came over from Asia during the last ice age, or a wooden ship in the 1500's. And as Canadians we should be able to make the hard and noble choice to accept other cultures and make it easier for immigrants to be feel accepted in a new land. Only a few countries around the world are able to do this, instead of lamenting our accepting and accomadating culture, maybe be proud of it, as we are one of the few with the balls to do it. So Happy Holidays you morons.
20 hours ago · Like · 3
Ali C Aaron, you're my fucking hero. Just sayin'
20 hours ago · Like
Taylor Kyle Calderwood Well this status is getting more attention then I usually get I should do reposts more often :P
19 hours ago · Like
Ali C *facepalm* Boy, you were born stupid and you've been losing ground ever since.
19 hours ago · Like · 2
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Mine got a lot of attention too haha and now everyone thinks I'm an angry person :/
12 hours ago · Like
Ali C Well, either an angry person or a racist bigot, take your pick.
12 hours ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Um, Angry person. Haha. Though overall I prefer 'Rightfully opinionated
12 hours ago · Like
Ali C Yeah, Racist it is.
11 hours ago · Like
Thomas Irwin actually.. most of those country's would just kill you if you hated their customs. Asking them to leave is much more progressive. realistically we're canadian. We'll bitch and whine and cry about it, but when it comes right down to it we won't force you to do anything. In fact. We'll probably make a law that gives you the right to do whatever we dislike you doing. But thats cool because we'd rather accomodate the latest and greatest Sociological fad instead of sticking to our guns because its more PC. We're not an accomodating culture. We're a Politically correct Fad waiting to happen.
11 hours ago · Unlike · 1
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols ohhh name calling online, how big of you, random person I have never met, who knows very, very little about me. You see me as racist because I believe people should be able to imply what they believe or celebrate at any place at any time. Because I dream of a world where people can say "Merry Christmas", "Happy Hanukkah", "Happy Kwanzaa" or whatever the fuck. I dislike the idea of people forcing their religion down other peoples throats or constantly voicing it, but saying "Merry Christmas"? Big fucking deal.
I have more atheist friends than I can count that set up a Christmas tree (which was invented by PAGAN's BTW), give and receive gifts and say "Merry Christmas". It isn't a big deal and shouldn't be treated as one. Christmas is no longer, and never really was, exclusive to Christians.
The World should be working on tolerance and acceptance, instead of working so hard to please those who won't tolerate and won't accept.
Everyone should be able to show who they are. Wherever.
11 hours ago · Like · 1
Ali C Sorry, couldnt hear you, try taking your klan hood off before speaking.
11 hours ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols Actually, you probably can't hear me, cause I'm typing to you. 'Reading' is the idea here.
Aaron Francesco Lamacchia Again no one is taking away your right to your traditions and customs, or your right to say merry Christmas. The issue is with the government support of religious holidays. Of our 10 stat holidays, 3 are Christian, Easter Monday, Good Friday, and Christmas. We have zero stat holidays for any other religion.
In Canada, religion and state are two separate entities, the government should not be allowed to support any religion. And when the government, say...puts up a giant Christmas tree in the middle of town with tax payer money, that's support. Essentially what is happening is the government is forcing everyone who does not believe in that particular brand of bullshit to help foot the bill for your celebration. Which is not right, just to clarify.
Say merry Christmas to everyone, no one cares and no one will stop you. Call it a Christmas tree, who gives a crap. But do not think that you are any one else has the right to force your holidays on our government.
And lindsay, you state that you dream of a world of tolerance, yet you post something that specifically says, "Well.... If you don't like our "Customs" and it offends you so much, then LEAVE.... I will help you pack." That's hardly tolerating and accepting someone. Someone who simply doesn't want to use his money to support your religious holidays.
Christmas trees were not pagan, they were a German tradition and Germans were Christian. And Christmas is a christian holiday, and was very exclusive to Christians. Only recently has it been watered down to a consumer holiday, celebrated by the majority.
And Thomas my response to you was in 2003 Rajinder Atwal was convicted and given a life sentence for killing his 17 year old daughter because she was dating a friend. Its called an honor killing, and its widely practiced in pakistan, and to a much lesser extent India. Last time I checked there is no Canadian law allowing honor killing on Canadian soil. The supreme court just upheld a ban on polygamy, specifically under-age and forced marriage, which is common in fundamental Mormonism, and in India Islamic men are allowed multiple wives. So i would hardly say we pass laws to protect the shit we hate.
4 hours ago · Like · 2
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols You have your opinion, I have mine. Let's agree to disagree and stop spamming Taylor's status.
52 minutes ago · Like
Lindsay Arlene Lena Epp-Nichols One thing though. I Do agree that "Well.... If you don't like our "Customs" and it offends you so much, then LEAVE.... I will help you pack." is offensive. People can like or dislike whatever they want. That part I regret not cutting out of mine. It's hateful and not right.
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
My cat is the cutest, cuddliest kitty in the whole world.
Things I like about today.
That moment, where your a couple days late on your period, and right when your about to pee on a stick, you pull down your panties and there is blood! Glorious, glorious blood. I deeply enjoy not being pregnant. There's just something about not spending a grand to have something killed or sacrificing the rest of your life, that just makes a girl happy.
In other news I smoked pot for the first time in my life. Kyle offered, and to throw Chris off I said yes. Though honestly I always thought my first time would be with Steven.
It was way fucking better than those brownies. Oh gawd those brownies... never again. So anyways, back to pot, it's relaxing for sure, and it makes my head feel heavy. I would probably do it again if offered and in the right mood, but I still wouldn't say it's really my thing. I'm not really a big drinker either. I guess, I just don't like not feeling 100% in control of my body. Also my reaction times are a lot slower when I'm high. OH, and I feel a lot less angry and irritable, which is nice.
This penguin costume is itchy.
I sold my blazer today. 3000$ in my pocket! I do miss it though. It's reliability and it's airplane noises. Byebye blaze. Hope my alcoholic cousin takes good care of you.
That's all for now.
-Lindsay
That moment, where your a couple days late on your period, and right when your about to pee on a stick, you pull down your panties and there is blood! Glorious, glorious blood. I deeply enjoy not being pregnant. There's just something about not spending a grand to have something killed or sacrificing the rest of your life, that just makes a girl happy.
In other news I smoked pot for the first time in my life. Kyle offered, and to throw Chris off I said yes. Though honestly I always thought my first time would be with Steven.
It was way fucking better than those brownies. Oh gawd those brownies... never again. So anyways, back to pot, it's relaxing for sure, and it makes my head feel heavy. I would probably do it again if offered and in the right mood, but I still wouldn't say it's really my thing. I'm not really a big drinker either. I guess, I just don't like not feeling 100% in control of my body. Also my reaction times are a lot slower when I'm high. OH, and I feel a lot less angry and irritable, which is nice.
This penguin costume is itchy.
I sold my blazer today. 3000$ in my pocket! I do miss it though. It's reliability and it's airplane noises. Byebye blaze. Hope my alcoholic cousin takes good care of you.
That's all for now.
-Lindsay
Monday, October 31, 2011
Finnegans Neighborhood Pub
Holy nut bags, it is dingy! It's a small, dirty little store :P But hey! I get to be lazy as fuck there. Basically you just stock beer, then sit on a chair all day, reading or playing on a DS in my case. It's pretty sweet. Only pays 9.75 an hour plus tips (Which aren't so great in the morning, but hey, whatever). Speaking of morning, my shift runs 9 to 4, which is perfect for me. 7 hours of doing nothing then 4 or 5 at Boston, working my ass off. Perfect. Money is good! I think I'll quit finnegans or whatever in like, February.
On a related note, the owner of Finnegans seems sketchy. He sleeps in the basement, gets up at 1pm everyday, doesn't go to sleep until 5am. Doesn't update his building at all. Pretty sure the pub is going to end when he dies. It's a dive. Well... Here's too the next three months of work! Hallelujah.
- Lindsay
On a related note, the owner of Finnegans seems sketchy. He sleeps in the basement, gets up at 1pm everyday, doesn't go to sleep until 5am. Doesn't update his building at all. Pretty sure the pub is going to end when he dies. It's a dive. Well... Here's too the next three months of work! Hallelujah.
- Lindsay
Saturday, October 29, 2011
I have no idea what to post about
Blah blah blah let's see here. Ohh, I know. I'm gonna talk about chronic liars. All my life I have had at least one of those friends that just lies, really casually all the time. When I was young, it was Matraca, then it was Danielle, the Cheyanne, ect... Now it's... well let's call her Amy. Well for some reason Amy lies a lot. Not about anything big really just random lies, for something interesting to say. For example, she claimed her car was so good on gas it cost 7$ to drive from Dawson to Edmonton. Car was at empty... put 7$ of gas in it... drove to Edmonton... no problem. Uh huh. When we drove it took 80$ to get to Edmonton... in that exact car.
Don`t get me wrong, she`s one of my best friends, typically she`s a really great person. It is just really really annoying. Don`t tell people you have over 1000 books when I have lived in your house and seen that you don`t, don`t tell people you have 1000 movies when I know you don`t. Just... just don`t. I`m nice enough not to call you out on it, but I might snap one day and do it.
I love her, I don`t want to embarrass her, but it bugs the shit out of me. Just tell the truth. People will still find you interesting. There's plenty good things about you that people will like. You don't have to lie about what you own. Your gonna get caught in a lie one day, and it's gonna suck.
Gah, people.
- Lindsay
Don`t get me wrong, she`s one of my best friends, typically she`s a really great person. It is just really really annoying. Don`t tell people you have over 1000 books when I have lived in your house and seen that you don`t, don`t tell people you have 1000 movies when I know you don`t. Just... just don`t. I`m nice enough not to call you out on it, but I might snap one day and do it.
I love her, I don`t want to embarrass her, but it bugs the shit out of me. Just tell the truth. People will still find you interesting. There's plenty good things about you that people will like. You don't have to lie about what you own. Your gonna get caught in a lie one day, and it's gonna suck.
Gah, people.
- Lindsay
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Stood Up
So I have never been popular. But, I mean except for grade 2 & 3 (cause I was a 'new kid') I've never been unpopular either. I was always that sort of person that everyone can be friends with. Which is why I am both popular and unpopular. Easy to get along with, fun, whatever, but I'm not picky, gossipy or stuck up at all, which it's really hard to get a girl's attention unless you have interesting information about someone else. It's true. When I have a party or something, generally anyone I invite shows up, that kind of thing. But not recently. I've come to a very sad realization that I have no friends. Well, that's not true I have friends, but not like I did. I have Sam...& Danika. These are the only 2 people that live in Dawson Creek that I hang out with. That's it. Just those three. There used to be far more than that.
Guess I should point out where this is coming from. So today I had planned a Halloween shindig. You know who showed up? Sam and Brad. That's it. Even my own boyfriend didn't want to hang out with me. I spent the whole day cleaning my house and baking cupcakes for the people I invited and 2 out of 12 people showed up, and it hurts. It really does. Even Kyle, Chris and Tera who LIVE here, hid in the bedroom. WTF? I'm actually kind of mad a little bit. Danika didn't even drop by. Gah... just really hurt. Which is stupid I know, I'm just not used to being stood up. They had 2 weeks notice...
Anyways, so I don't fucking get it. My biggest problem I would have to say, is I can't find any girlfriends. Boys, Fuck boys everywhere! Seems like every guy and their dog wants to hump my leg if I wanna, but that's all I get. Male attention. I HAVE A FUCKING BOYFRIEND, I DON'T NEED ANOTHER ONE. I would love to have friends that are guys if I could still do that, but I'm at a place in my life where I can't have that... maybe in school. :(
Half the reason I want to go to school so bad is the prospect of friends. Why is this so hard! I'm not mean, I'm not ugly, I'm sorta funny? and kind of interesting? I'm always up for whatever...
I just want to have friends again. Jade, Ryan, Tylar, Mitch, Quin, Steven, Sianna, Brendan, Jaynell Joel... anyone and everyone I used to be able to hang out has moved away, or in Jade's case, stole my stuff. Everyone who is still here I never hung out much with in the first place, or they have their own life.
Danika and Sam. The only really friends I have. How sad. Still good people and all, but Sam has Brad, and Danika has a selection of friends I only wish I had.
Guess I should point out where this is coming from. So today I had planned a Halloween shindig. You know who showed up? Sam and Brad. That's it. Even my own boyfriend didn't want to hang out with me. I spent the whole day cleaning my house and baking cupcakes for the people I invited and 2 out of 12 people showed up, and it hurts. It really does. Even Kyle, Chris and Tera who LIVE here, hid in the bedroom. WTF? I'm actually kind of mad a little bit. Danika didn't even drop by. Gah... just really hurt. Which is stupid I know, I'm just not used to being stood up. They had 2 weeks notice...
Anyways, so I don't fucking get it. My biggest problem I would have to say, is I can't find any girlfriends. Boys, Fuck boys everywhere! Seems like every guy and their dog wants to hump my leg if I wanna, but that's all I get. Male attention. I HAVE A FUCKING BOYFRIEND, I DON'T NEED ANOTHER ONE. I would love to have friends that are guys if I could still do that, but I'm at a place in my life where I can't have that... maybe in school. :(
Half the reason I want to go to school so bad is the prospect of friends. Why is this so hard! I'm not mean, I'm not ugly, I'm sorta funny? and kind of interesting? I'm always up for whatever...
I just want to have friends again. Jade, Ryan, Tylar, Mitch, Quin, Steven, Sianna, Brendan, Jaynell Joel... anyone and everyone I used to be able to hang out has moved away, or in Jade's case, stole my stuff. Everyone who is still here I never hung out much with in the first place, or they have their own life.
Danika and Sam. The only really friends I have. How sad. Still good people and all, but Sam has Brad, and Danika has a selection of friends I only wish I had.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
My Ford Contour and why I hate it.
I have this lovely ass blue Ford Contour that I bought this summer (In June) for 1400$ from some bitch who advertised it as their being no known problems with the vehicle. Long story short, she lied.
But If I did just use the short story you wouldn't have had much read so here it is;
So we go to GP to get an out of province vehicle that obviously, we're going to have to get an out of province inspection for, so we ask "Will it pass an out of province inspection?" and ugo says "I don't see why not?"
Well here's why not.
Needed a new timing belt (This we knew and is why the price was lowered $100)
The car does not produce heat (Needs new blower motor)
Heat gauge does not work (Needs a new heat sensor)
Broken Strut
There's more I'm sure
Tire cap or something.
Mc.Slutface advertised "No known problems with the vehicle"
You lying bitch, how would you not know when your vehicle isn't producing heat? How could you think that big *Clunk Clunk* sound was normal??
It's in part our fault for not test driving it a little (Illegal or not). We ran the engine, lifted the hood (Which is how we found the timing belt problem), and checked out the tires, but we should have done more, for sure.
Anyways, about 2500$ has gone into this piece of shit, and it sucks, But I will survive.
Also, I have a buyer for my Blazer :D 3000$ Yay!
But If I did just use the short story you wouldn't have had much read so here it is;
So we go to GP to get an out of province vehicle that obviously, we're going to have to get an out of province inspection for, so we ask "Will it pass an out of province inspection?" and ugo says "I don't see why not?"
Well here's why not.
Needed a new timing belt (This we knew and is why the price was lowered $100)
The car does not produce heat (Needs new blower motor)
Heat gauge does not work (Needs a new heat sensor)
Broken Strut
There's more I'm sure
Tire cap or something.
Mc.Slutface advertised "No known problems with the vehicle"
You lying bitch, how would you not know when your vehicle isn't producing heat? How could you think that big *Clunk Clunk* sound was normal??
It's in part our fault for not test driving it a little (Illegal or not). We ran the engine, lifted the hood (Which is how we found the timing belt problem), and checked out the tires, but we should have done more, for sure.
Anyways, about 2500$ has gone into this piece of shit, and it sucks, But I will survive.
Also, I have a buyer for my Blazer :D 3000$ Yay!
Friday, September 16, 2011
David Nichols's Daughter
So here I am at work minding my own buisness serving customers when all of a sudden, my dad shows up. I go "Hi Dad." He goes "Your mom left me. I'm leaving town, your probably never going to see me again." Hugs me and then leaves. So, naturally, I run to the bathroom and cry. Everyone's in a whirl like "omg, are you okay?" I'm crying and making horribly embarressing noises that come with hysterical crying, then go back to work once I have calmed down. I agreed to stay and make sure it doesn't get busy, then my supervisor, Ray will send me home early, due to the fact that I need to see my mom, and not be on the verge of crying at work.
Then my brother pops in, tells me my dad's an idiot and that mom is staying at his place now, for a while. I start to bawl again cause my bro hugs me and tells me he loves me. It's rare he tells me that unless things are serious and he knows I really need it.
So by this time Ray's like "You can go home now" all panicky a little bit. So I go home. My dad does some more dumb shit. You know for fun I'm gonna list and quote some of these things.
- Smashes several objects in the house
- Asks my brother if he can come over to clean it up (Clean your own fucking mess.)
- Almost cuts my mom's wedding ring in half
- Called to tell me he saw Lea laughing with a cab driver in another cab, which I guess obviously means they were laughing about him.
- Says she's going to turn everyone against him (Cause you know, we're in high school)
- Tells me on the phone that he's going to kill himself, then sets the phone down so I can hear him opening pill bottles
-Asks me to give messages to my mom
- Calls my mom over and over asking if they will get back together, than asks me if I think she's lying.
- Says Devin hates him cause my brother won't take his crap
- There's the fact he brought his problems to my work -__-
-Called me about 20 times in 2 days
- Says I'm his only friend and that he needs me to listen to his problems (Not friend Dad. Daughter D-A-U-G-H-T-E-R)
Gah. Idiot.
If I wanted children, I wouldn't have wasted so much money on condoms and birth control.
So 3 days after this all started. They're back together. Bad move Mom. The worst thing to do is usually the easiest, and that is unfortunate. I know.
It would have been wonderful to have had a normal family where your parents took care of you physically and emotionally, instead of the other way around. However, on the bright side, all this and the other 22 years of crap my brother went through, and the 19 I went through makes us all the more determined to have a great family of our own. I will be sure to protect, comfort and advise my children in all the ways, my parents did not. My brother and I have even agreed to have children around the same time if we can and we will have an amazing, big family all our own. Stop this genetic disaster in it's tracks.
- Lindsay. (AKA David's unfortunate Daughter)
Then my brother pops in, tells me my dad's an idiot and that mom is staying at his place now, for a while. I start to bawl again cause my bro hugs me and tells me he loves me. It's rare he tells me that unless things are serious and he knows I really need it.
So by this time Ray's like "You can go home now" all panicky a little bit. So I go home. My dad does some more dumb shit. You know for fun I'm gonna list and quote some of these things.
- Smashes several objects in the house
- Asks my brother if he can come over to clean it up (Clean your own fucking mess.)
- Almost cuts my mom's wedding ring in half
- Called to tell me he saw Lea laughing with a cab driver in another cab, which I guess obviously means they were laughing about him.
- Says she's going to turn everyone against him (Cause you know, we're in high school)
- Tells me on the phone that he's going to kill himself, then sets the phone down so I can hear him opening pill bottles
-Asks me to give messages to my mom
- Calls my mom over and over asking if they will get back together, than asks me if I think she's lying.
- Says Devin hates him cause my brother won't take his crap
- There's the fact he brought his problems to my work -__-
-Called me about 20 times in 2 days
- Says I'm his only friend and that he needs me to listen to his problems (Not friend Dad. Daughter D-A-U-G-H-T-E-R)
Gah. Idiot.
If I wanted children, I wouldn't have wasted so much money on condoms and birth control.
So 3 days after this all started. They're back together. Bad move Mom. The worst thing to do is usually the easiest, and that is unfortunate. I know.
It would have been wonderful to have had a normal family where your parents took care of you physically and emotionally, instead of the other way around. However, on the bright side, all this and the other 22 years of crap my brother went through, and the 19 I went through makes us all the more determined to have a great family of our own. I will be sure to protect, comfort and advise my children in all the ways, my parents did not. My brother and I have even agreed to have children around the same time if we can and we will have an amazing, big family all our own. Stop this genetic disaster in it's tracks.
- Lindsay. (AKA David's unfortunate Daughter)
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Crafts
Today I bought canvas's, oil pants, and paint brushes. Chris also bought me a coloring book with dinosaurs :D Happy Day.
I've been very sick these past couple days, and the worst of it (aside from the horribly burning throat the first two days) has been the sinus headaches. When I tilt my head upside down, it hurts :(
I've been incredibly lazy lately. Our house looks like hell. Thank god for Tera, She cleans and she doesn't even live here. Gah, at least the boys clean the kitchen. I've touched it like, twice maybe. I hate dishes. I just hate them. It may have something to do with my dad making me wash dishes by hand twice a day for ten years, but who knows. I do all our laundry (for Chris and I), I clean our bedroom, and we both clean the living room. It's flawed but okay system that just sort of happened.
I'm going to have a halloween party. It's gonna be bad ass I have decided. This shall be my costume.
I wore bunny years and a tail for halloween in grade 7. I shall have the coolest costume there.
I'm a lot less fun nowadays. I need to fix that.
So that's all I have for now.
I've been very sick these past couple days, and the worst of it (aside from the horribly burning throat the first two days) has been the sinus headaches. When I tilt my head upside down, it hurts :(
I've been incredibly lazy lately. Our house looks like hell. Thank god for Tera, She cleans and she doesn't even live here. Gah, at least the boys clean the kitchen. I've touched it like, twice maybe. I hate dishes. I just hate them. It may have something to do with my dad making me wash dishes by hand twice a day for ten years, but who knows. I do all our laundry (for Chris and I), I clean our bedroom, and we both clean the living room. It's flawed but okay system that just sort of happened.
I'm going to have a halloween party. It's gonna be bad ass I have decided. This shall be my costume.
I wore bunny years and a tail for halloween in grade 7. I shall have the coolest costume there.
I'm a lot less fun nowadays. I need to fix that.
So that's all I have for now.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Torn two ways, once again.
Psst... Wanna know a secret? Okay. It's not really a secret. I didn't go to university, partly (a bigger part than I care to admit) so I could be with Chris. He's quite amazing you know. He's cute, and he really really loves me. I love him so very, very much. He's the best part of my life.
The worst part of my life is living in Dawson. I hate it here. I feel like a useless piece of crap for staying here. It's been a good year, and I like my job and everything, but I have been living here for 19 years, and I hate it here. I just want to get away from all these same faces. I want to live somewhere warm, I want to see the world, but I know he doesn't. Not like I do.
I want to go to Italy. I want to go to school. I want to meet a whole new breed of people, see a different setting. I want to take him with me, I don't know if he will come.
I'm going. I just wish I knew what that means for us.
The worst part of my life is living in Dawson. I hate it here. I feel like a useless piece of crap for staying here. It's been a good year, and I like my job and everything, but I have been living here for 19 years, and I hate it here. I just want to get away from all these same faces. I want to live somewhere warm, I want to see the world, but I know he doesn't. Not like I do.
I want to go to Italy. I want to go to school. I want to meet a whole new breed of people, see a different setting. I want to take him with me, I don't know if he will come.
I'm going. I just wish I knew what that means for us.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
It's only 2am.
Sometimes I wonder what the rest of life is going to end up like, and wish I could have questions answered for me, like is Chris the person I really am going to marry? I hope so. I wish I could look into the future a little bit, but on the other hand I don't. What if the rest of life turns out to be fairly boring? That would be pretty disappointing. And what exactly is the definition of boring? Are drama and excitement the same thing? In some instances I really hate drama, well, really I hate angry drama, or sad drama. I just hate arguments. Bit is there such a thing as happy drama? What would be classified as that? I don't know. I just don't want to lead a boring life.
Sometimes I have the feeling certain things aren't over. Maybe put to rest for a while, but there must be something else, you know?
I want everything to change and stay the same
- Lindsay
Sometimes I have the feeling certain things aren't over. Maybe put to rest for a while, but there must be something else, you know?
I want everything to change and stay the same
- Lindsay
Monday, July 25, 2011
Dear Steven.
Your blog was long, so I thought I would give you the same courtesy. I also have examined the possibility of being homeless. Mostly when I walk around and stuff and see a place that would be a good spot to sleep in if I was homeless, and I make note of it.
This is why insidious was gay. Soon as Darth Maul showed up, everything got really fake looking and predictable. Not very scary at all. Everyone's pissing them self over this movie and I (an extremely nightmare prone person) was not really bothered at all about it. People are just getting sad.
I love my job. I have finally found a job that I like as much as I liked Dairy Queen (Which was a lot) But I'll be making tips this time. Yay! Most people would be a little bit ashamed to say this is what I was meant to do! So, I'm not going to say that, but I do like my job. Zack would probably have to be my favorite person there because he's fun/ funny and he's good at what he does. That kid was meant to be a server.
One of the most attractive qualities I can find in a man is shyness. Not so chronic where they can't talk to me at all, but still shy. Chris was super shy when we started dating. For example, he had to text me and ask permission if he could put his arm around me, I had to sit on the other side of the bed and threaten to stay there and not cuddle with him until he took off his shirt (The first time I got to see his naked upper half); he was all cute and scared and stuff, but he did it, cause he liked me. I practically raped that boy. But now, alas, a year later almost and he farts fearlessly, whips out his dick, whenever wherever (I swear I've seen it more times than his face). I wish that shyness quality would come back a bit. I do miss it. But I guess shyness, in most aspects really is quite temporary.
We're moving into a green trailer with Kyle in tow. Splitting the rent three ways. about 420$ each a month. Plus utilities. I hope this doesn't bankrupt me too much haha, but we will see. The living room is huge (There's an extension) and so is the kitchen. Bedrooms are big as well, Chris and I have a walk in closet. The only issue I have is the bathroom. It's kind of grubby. I hope the water is good. You can never really trust trailers for good water. Should have checked while we were there, but I mean really, for 1,250 a month, we're not going to do better, not in Dawson.
- Lindsay
This is why insidious was gay. Soon as Darth Maul showed up, everything got really fake looking and predictable. Not very scary at all. Everyone's pissing them self over this movie and I (an extremely nightmare prone person) was not really bothered at all about it. People are just getting sad.
I love my job. I have finally found a job that I like as much as I liked Dairy Queen (Which was a lot) But I'll be making tips this time. Yay! Most people would be a little bit ashamed to say this is what I was meant to do! So, I'm not going to say that, but I do like my job. Zack would probably have to be my favorite person there because he's fun/ funny and he's good at what he does. That kid was meant to be a server.
One of the most attractive qualities I can find in a man is shyness. Not so chronic where they can't talk to me at all, but still shy. Chris was super shy when we started dating. For example, he had to text me and ask permission if he could put his arm around me, I had to sit on the other side of the bed and threaten to stay there and not cuddle with him until he took off his shirt (The first time I got to see his naked upper half); he was all cute and scared and stuff, but he did it, cause he liked me. I practically raped that boy. But now, alas, a year later almost and he farts fearlessly, whips out his dick, whenever wherever (I swear I've seen it more times than his face). I wish that shyness quality would come back a bit. I do miss it. But I guess shyness, in most aspects really is quite temporary.
We're moving into a green trailer with Kyle in tow. Splitting the rent three ways. about 420$ each a month. Plus utilities. I hope this doesn't bankrupt me too much haha, but we will see. The living room is huge (There's an extension) and so is the kitchen. Bedrooms are big as well, Chris and I have a walk in closet. The only issue I have is the bathroom. It's kind of grubby. I hope the water is good. You can never really trust trailers for good water. Should have checked while we were there, but I mean really, for 1,250 a month, we're not going to do better, not in Dawson.
- Lindsay
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Sometimes the party takes you places that you didn't really plan on going.
Deleted. My god that was awful.
Saturday, July 9, 2011
Don't go breaking my heart... I couldn't if I tried
One more week. One more week until Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 2 premiers. and about 6 and a half days until I get my second tattoo, which is also very exciting. Yay!
So I now work at Boston Pizza, training to be a server, which I have always wanted to do. The manager that works there, Chris, is very very touchy. Always touching me. Always. Touches me more than My Chris does. I don't really mind though, it sounds more creepy than it is. Though not altogether uncreepy.
In hindsight it's not really the best job for my at all. I forget things easily, but it's been assumed that I would make good tips because of my personality. We shall see I guess.
I may get a second job, at an old fashioned Candy store, a friend of the family's is thinking about opening up. my shift would be from like, 10 - 230, which sounds nice, and I like candy. Mmmm... candyyy.
Plans to visit Rybaby in Vancouver are set for the 21st of August. Hopefully I make enough money in the time to go. I`m sure I will. I must! I must I say!
You. I feel like we're having a status battle on Facebook as to who has the happier life. If so, I win, since the last time you got laid was in grade 11.
That is all.
- Lindsay
So I now work at Boston Pizza, training to be a server, which I have always wanted to do. The manager that works there, Chris, is very very touchy. Always touching me. Always. Touches me more than My Chris does. I don't really mind though, it sounds more creepy than it is. Though not altogether uncreepy.
In hindsight it's not really the best job for my at all. I forget things easily, but it's been assumed that I would make good tips because of my personality. We shall see I guess.
I may get a second job, at an old fashioned Candy store, a friend of the family's is thinking about opening up. my shift would be from like, 10 - 230, which sounds nice, and I like candy. Mmmm... candyyy.
Plans to visit Rybaby in Vancouver are set for the 21st of August. Hopefully I make enough money in the time to go. I`m sure I will. I must! I must I say!
You. I feel like we're having a status battle on Facebook as to who has the happier life. If so, I win, since the last time you got laid was in grade 11.
That is all.
- Lindsay
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Home Home Home Home Home Homo Homosexual. Yup.
So after 3 weeks of living and working in the asshole of B.C. for a crazy bitch I am finally home. Made my savings goal for school already so I suppose it was worth it, but if I had gone for more than 3 weeks, it wouldn't have been, for I would be dead. Those semi's really don't slow down that much, I could easily jump in front of one and die.
Things I hate about Chetwynd:
- There's no Christopher
- They have 1 gas station
- A bag of cherries at the grocery store was 20.60 before tax. Wasn't even a big bag.
- They have NO sit down restaurants that do not serve Chinese food. Not One.
- No matter how ugly I tried to make myself, every creep in that town hit on me
- Every person stares at you like "Whoa I've never seen you before, you must not live her, cause trust me, I'd know if you live here"
- Everyone is too excited to meet someone they are not related too
- Every female is a bitch
Never going back there again unless I'm just passing through or I am going to see Lonni. The Pine Pass is totally fucked up, and one of the CRS guys did a great job convincing me that the world is going to start ending in 2012. I'm pretty creeped out. I don't actually believe the world will end in 2012, but he convinced me enough to be creeped out.
I really wanted to go see Steven while I have a lot of money to do so, but meh, I will just go when the Pine Pass opens. I miss him and very much wish to see him.
I also really want to see Ryan, which it looks like I will be able to. I will get to go on a plane for the first time. That's exciting. And I have only seen the ocean once and barely remember it, so i would like to do that.
The summer seems promising now that I am out of that clusterfuck of a job.
- Lindsay
Things I hate about Chetwynd:
- There's no Christopher
- They have 1 gas station
- A bag of cherries at the grocery store was 20.60 before tax. Wasn't even a big bag.
- They have NO sit down restaurants that do not serve Chinese food. Not One.
- No matter how ugly I tried to make myself, every creep in that town hit on me
- Every person stares at you like "Whoa I've never seen you before, you must not live her, cause trust me, I'd know if you live here"
- Everyone is too excited to meet someone they are not related too
- Every female is a bitch
Never going back there again unless I'm just passing through or I am going to see Lonni. The Pine Pass is totally fucked up, and one of the CRS guys did a great job convincing me that the world is going to start ending in 2012. I'm pretty creeped out. I don't actually believe the world will end in 2012, but he convinced me enough to be creeped out.
I really wanted to go see Steven while I have a lot of money to do so, but meh, I will just go when the Pine Pass opens. I miss him and very much wish to see him.
I also really want to see Ryan, which it looks like I will be able to. I will get to go on a plane for the first time. That's exciting. And I have only seen the ocean once and barely remember it, so i would like to do that.
The summer seems promising now that I am out of that clusterfuck of a job.
- Lindsay
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Money, money, money. Not at all funny in my world.
I used to have 6000$ in my bank, now I have 4000$, and it isn't growing. I have a job but they are not giving me enough hours. I am so stressed out and in order to calm down I am going to have to set some different goals for myself. No longer is 10,000$ my goal for September... I'm changing it to 7000$ in the hope that this lowers my stress levels. Though this does make me very sad, It seems this is what I have to do. I have to break a lot of the promises I made this summer. Overall I am just very very unhappy and want to be left alone and isolated. I hope this doesn't last long, for I have spent far too much of my life being sad.
Being unemployed for nearly two months was a stupid decision made by a dumb girl.
- Hoping it all works out
Lindsay.
Being unemployed for nearly two months was a stupid decision made by a dumb girl.
- Hoping it all works out
Lindsay.
Monday, April 4, 2011
Ew.
So my grandma crapped all over the floor in the middle of night and didn't bother to clean it up. Just made a new bed on the other couch and went back to sleep. Who the fuck does that? My Grandma is the answer. My Grandmother. Is she incapable of cleaning it up? No. My mother is less able to do it than she is, being that my mom has MS. In fact, my grandmother dearest went bowling after. Just left her shit (I do mean literal shit) all over the floor, and left.
Dear Grandma,
You don't have a bowel problem. Not really. ALL YOU EAT IS YOGURT! That's it!! Yogurt and old fruit. You don't believe in expire dates. You eat old yogurt and milk. THAT IS WHY YOU SHIT ALL OVER THE PLACE.
My parents live in my grandma's house. (She has more than one.) They rent from her. Last summer my grandma asked to stay the night there, and never left. Now my parents are stuck with her. She doesn't clean up after herself and she is a total bitch. She has been living there for 8 months and she has not once, NOT ONCE had a bath or a shower. How fucking disgusting is that?
UGH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
This isn't even supposed to be my problem but my parents are less independent than Sam and so it becomes my problem because I'm the person they complain to and ask for help. They can't make her leave, it's her house. They can't leave, cause they apparently can't afford it.
Dear Parents,
Get yourselves out of debt. Make some cut backs, and get shit done, before your covered in it, and move out. I am your child, I should not have to tell you that!
Son of a bitch.
I do not want to take care of anyone. It's why I'm pro abortion.
- Pissed off and tired.
Dear Grandma,
You don't have a bowel problem. Not really. ALL YOU EAT IS YOGURT! That's it!! Yogurt and old fruit. You don't believe in expire dates. You eat old yogurt and milk. THAT IS WHY YOU SHIT ALL OVER THE PLACE.
My parents live in my grandma's house. (She has more than one.) They rent from her. Last summer my grandma asked to stay the night there, and never left. Now my parents are stuck with her. She doesn't clean up after herself and she is a total bitch. She has been living there for 8 months and she has not once, NOT ONCE had a bath or a shower. How fucking disgusting is that?
UGH! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
This isn't even supposed to be my problem but my parents are less independent than Sam and so it becomes my problem because I'm the person they complain to and ask for help. They can't make her leave, it's her house. They can't leave, cause they apparently can't afford it.
Dear Parents,
Get yourselves out of debt. Make some cut backs, and get shit done, before your covered in it, and move out. I am your child, I should not have to tell you that!
Son of a bitch.
I do not want to take care of anyone. It's why I'm pro abortion.
- Pissed off and tired.
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Since I'm here, for another god damn year...
Chris and I are going to rent a house. Well, not just me and Chris but us and two others. Those two others hopefully being Kael and Jade. My best friend, and his best friend. I'm looking forward to this. Yeah, I have to stay back another year but this is a pretty great upside.
Jade will be here on the 19th to visit for a week and a half or so. I'm gonna spring the question on her, I'm gonna ask her to marry me and have my babies and stuff. You know, live with me. I'm really excited about this. She's my favorite girl in the world and since I am unemployed I get to spend lots of time with her. I hope she says yes, I bought a pretty ring and everything.
I am definitely taking her to the strippers. Since she's 18 now I can LEGALLY take her there. I don't think she's been out drinking legally yet because she lives in Kamloops. It's not exactly as close to Alberta as Dawson is. She's bummed Steven isn't here for it, and I am too.
I hope she likes everyone that I can out with regularly now. I hope she can tolerate Skylar. I've gotta convince her that he can grow on you... I'm excited. Yay... something to look forward to.
- Happy, but Jobless
Jade will be here on the 19th to visit for a week and a half or so. I'm gonna spring the question on her, I'm gonna ask her to marry me and have my babies and stuff. You know, live with me. I'm really excited about this. She's my favorite girl in the world and since I am unemployed I get to spend lots of time with her. I hope she says yes, I bought a pretty ring and everything.
I am definitely taking her to the strippers. Since she's 18 now I can LEGALLY take her there. I don't think she's been out drinking legally yet because she lives in Kamloops. It's not exactly as close to Alberta as Dawson is. She's bummed Steven isn't here for it, and I am too.
I hope she likes everyone that I can out with regularly now. I hope she can tolerate Skylar. I've gotta convince her that he can grow on you... I'm excited. Yay... something to look forward to.
- Happy, but Jobless
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Langara
So Langara sent me a lovely email asking for certain information and certain requirements before I could be admitted into Library information and technology. The prerequisites that were listed before I applied was just for me to have completed grade 12 or be 19, which I have and I will be. NOW however, after I've applied they're all like "You also need 90% in English 12 or a C- in a university English class. You need two letters of reference, and we also need to meet you in person and do some testing." What. the. fuck. Being a librarian does not seem like it would entail this much work, does it? Now I'm stuck in Dawson for another entire fucking year. You suck Langara. I hate you.
On the bright side: Chris. He's the only reason I'm not going to Vancouver and doing these courses there. This gives me another year with him, I like that. I like that very much.
- Lindsay
It's not much but it's something.
On the bright side: Chris. He's the only reason I'm not going to Vancouver and doing these courses there. This gives me another year with him, I like that. I like that very much.
- Lindsay
It's not much but it's something.
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Legacy
So I loved my job. Probably the best job I've had in a long time. Got paid 12$ an hour, time went by quickly, I liked everyone I worked with. It was a pretty good job to have for a year or so. At least, I planned to be there for a year, but sadly at 7 months, I am leaving. My boss is a bitch. And my other boss is also a bitch. They are bitches. Once apon a time I had gotten a little too comfortable at Legacy and started slacking off a bit. Not all that much really but I guess Tawnya thought so and decided to sit me down and have a little talk about it. Basically she told me that I did nothing and just let everyone else do the work, which was not true. Me and my co-workers made lists of what each of us would do that night. I always completed everything that was on my list, and did it well. Every other day we would switch lists and it never mattered which list I had, I always got shit done. However, my co-workers were doing extra things that I wasn't and so the kick in the ass that she gave me did me good.
The month after our little talk I worked twice as hard as everyone else, then eventually I slowed down to working just as hard as everyone, however still being one of her best employees. Two months after our 'talk' I started to notice that Tawnya and Cameron (her husband) where leaving me out of things, teaching the new, part time people things she wasn't teaching me. She even started reteaching people how to close till, and would no longer let me do it. Then the other day she decided she wanted to have another 'talk'. She told me a couple things I has been doing wrong that I understood, I had been showing up to work a few minutes a few times a week and she brought up that Chris is kind of inappropriate with me when he's there, which I understood alright. Then she told me that the other day Cameron was going to march down to the store and fire me on the spot, after seeing me leave the store while the store is closed, to start my car. I guess this is a security thing and I'm not allowed to leave the store while we're closed, I did not know this. He was going to fire me on the spot for something I did not know I was doing wrong. If it were anyone else he would not have reacted like that, and I know it.
As much as that all pissed me off I wasn't going to leave over it. Then she told me that I haven't been doing enough around here again. I regret not punching her in the mouth. Then because she knows she can't fire me for doing a good job of things she tells me that I should consider that Legacy isn't the right job for me.
Okay yeah I get it, for some reason you don't like me, you've shown it since day one, I'm not going to fight you, I'm leaving. Thanks very muchly for nothing you bitch.
The month after our little talk I worked twice as hard as everyone else, then eventually I slowed down to working just as hard as everyone, however still being one of her best employees. Two months after our 'talk' I started to notice that Tawnya and Cameron (her husband) where leaving me out of things, teaching the new, part time people things she wasn't teaching me. She even started reteaching people how to close till, and would no longer let me do it. Then the other day she decided she wanted to have another 'talk'. She told me a couple things I has been doing wrong that I understood, I had been showing up to work a few minutes a few times a week and she brought up that Chris is kind of inappropriate with me when he's there, which I understood alright. Then she told me that the other day Cameron was going to march down to the store and fire me on the spot, after seeing me leave the store while the store is closed, to start my car. I guess this is a security thing and I'm not allowed to leave the store while we're closed, I did not know this. He was going to fire me on the spot for something I did not know I was doing wrong. If it were anyone else he would not have reacted like that, and I know it.
As much as that all pissed me off I wasn't going to leave over it. Then she told me that I haven't been doing enough around here again. I regret not punching her in the mouth. Then because she knows she can't fire me for doing a good job of things she tells me that I should consider that Legacy isn't the right job for me.
Okay yeah I get it, for some reason you don't like me, you've shown it since day one, I'm not going to fight you, I'm leaving. Thanks very muchly for nothing you bitch.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Title
So I finally got to see Steven again on Friday. It was kinda weird. I really wanted to just run up and hug him but then it was like, oh Steven's girlfriend... hi. She's seems nice and everything but it was kind of weird because, we've never really hung out while he's been with someone he actually likes. She has a kind of, unsocial vibe, I dunno. Maybe it was Steven himself that seemed off, maybe it was me, but I sort of felt the same way when I saw Jeremy. I hadn't seen him in a long time and I didn't know what to say or do or how to show him how excited I really was to see him.
I don't think Steven has the slightest idea how much he really means to me. When I was lonely and sad he was the only person I could really talk to who could make me smile again. I have really great memories with him. I love him, really. I thought about him often when he was gone. I don't mean in a romantic way. At all. He's like a big brother I guess. Often I say that I don't really mean it, like with Cole and Brendan, but I really mean it when I talk about Steven. I told him I work the next seven days, but I'll try to hang out if I have time and he said I probably won't and I took that as sort of a hint that he didn't want to hang out, which is fine. I know of a lot of people that I think are alright but I just don't want to hang out with them or anything. Like Sarah. Well, I don't even like talking to Sarah.
Though, even if he did want to hang out, his girlfriend would be there. I know it sounds weird for me to say I'm not attracted to him, and then this; but I really just want to hang out just the two of us. I couldn't have Chris there because he would be wildly jealous of how hard Steven makes me laugh and assume I'm in love with him or something. And I don't like the idea of his girlfriend being there because I feel like I can't be myself. It sucks, but I guess it's time to move on. We both have different lives we need to live.
I guess I just miss you.
Quite a lot.
I don't think Steven has the slightest idea how much he really means to me. When I was lonely and sad he was the only person I could really talk to who could make me smile again. I have really great memories with him. I love him, really. I thought about him often when he was gone. I don't mean in a romantic way. At all. He's like a big brother I guess. Often I say that I don't really mean it, like with Cole and Brendan, but I really mean it when I talk about Steven. I told him I work the next seven days, but I'll try to hang out if I have time and he said I probably won't and I took that as sort of a hint that he didn't want to hang out, which is fine. I know of a lot of people that I think are alright but I just don't want to hang out with them or anything. Like Sarah. Well, I don't even like talking to Sarah.
Though, even if he did want to hang out, his girlfriend would be there. I know it sounds weird for me to say I'm not attracted to him, and then this; but I really just want to hang out just the two of us. I couldn't have Chris there because he would be wildly jealous of how hard Steven makes me laugh and assume I'm in love with him or something. And I don't like the idea of his girlfriend being there because I feel like I can't be myself. It sucks, but I guess it's time to move on. We both have different lives we need to live.
I guess I just miss you.
Quite a lot.
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